Two pastoral issues:
The father, Dong Yun Yoon, lost a parent, wife and two children. He said “”Please pray for him [the pilot] not to suffer from this accident.”
It’s true. The pilot, perhaps, wasn’t at fault. If Mr. Yoon had been angry, what then? He would have been equally justified. In the midst of such loss, there are no right or wrong emotions. Rage, frustration, sadness … I understand the person who just wants to throw oneself on the fire, or stand stoically amongst the dead.
The heartbreaker is this: “I know there are many people who have experienced more terrible things,” Yoon said. “But, please, tell me how to do it. I don’t know what to do.”
“Tell me how to do it.” Who could tell him how to do it? Nobody. No priest, grief therapist or doctor.
I often hear “it could be worse.” I have no problem with this. But sometimes it is also proper to say, “This blows. My life sucks right now. I hate it.” We can hate death and suffering and cry and weep because there is something wrong about this. It doesn’t matter if they are in a better place. It is alright to shake one’s fist and plead for mercy. Other people do suffer. They may suffer more. But Yoon isn’t living their lives.
He can ask, “Why is the the world so fucked up?”